Passion Riddled with Grace

John 21 opens with the familiar scene of fishers on a boat. According to the passage, at least 7 disciples were present. Peter, Thomas, Nathaniel, the sons of Zebedee (James and John), and two other unnamed disciples.

See, this is the 3rd time that Jesus has appeared to his disciples after his crucifixion (John 21:14). He shows up on the scene and basically does a replay of Luke 5 1-11. Simon (Peter), who was there for the first experience, recognizes Jesus after their nets become full of fish. Actually, it's not Peter who recognizes Jesus first, it's John - also known as "the disciple who Jesus loved." After John points out that the stranger on the shore is Jesus, Peter gets his outer garments and jumps into the water. What I picture, is that Peter jumps into the water in order to swim to Jesus and get there as fast as he can...and first. Why didn't Peter just stay in the boat and wait until they pulled everything ashore? Why couldn't Peter just stay in the boat?

What do we know about Peter?
- He is one of the first to be recruited by Jesus, along with James and John.
- He was a fisherman before following Christ with his brother Andrew.
- Jesus healed Peter's mother-in-law.
- It's Peter who gets out of the boat on the way to Gennesaret in the middle of the storm.
- Jesus calls Peter the "rock" on which He will build his church, and that Hades will not overcome it.
- Peter tells Jesus that He will not be killed as Jesus said He would - at this, Jesus addresses Peter and says, "Get behind me Satan! You are a stumbling block for me, you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men."
- Peter is there for the transfiguration.
- At the command of Jesus, Peter goes fishing and catches a fish with a four-drachma coin in its mouth to pay for the teaching tax of both Jesus and Peter.
- Peter is with Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane, at His most vulnerable. (Obviously, I mean vulnerable in His human likeness.
- It is Peter who denies or "disowns" Jesus 3 times.

After surveying the 4 gospel books of the Bible (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) - we know a great deal about Peter. He's like a case study, if you will. In the examples that are written down, Peter is either involved in, or present for a great number of them.

Peter's relationship with Jesus is personal. I'm not sure that really says what I want to say about it though. In the boat on the way to Gennesaret, it is Peter who responds to Jesus' claim that it is Him. He even goes beyond that to ask for proof! It's Peter, who protests aloud when Jesus is telling his disciples how he will die and what will happen. It is Peter who answers when Jesus asks, "Who do you say that I am?" Not only this, but at times, Jesus directly addresses Peter out of all the other disciples. Even though John is the disciple who Jesus loved the most, we read more about when Jesus addresses Peter than John. The Satan comment that comes from Jesus to Peter, the statement about his name being Peter and building a church, the confirmation that it will be Peter that denies him 3 times when the disciples scatter as it is written.

I believe this was done to teach the other disciples. Even more perhaps, to guide us into recognizing that it is forgivable to be imperfect and passionate toward Christ. Sure, it might not be the ideal, but it's much better than say...a luke-warm faith. People have difficulty accepting Peter's example here. Time and time again he takes the same kind of actions; ones birthed in deep emotion. He is generally quick to make a decision and act on it. These decisions are entirely of the heart and emotion, and have very little to do with logic, reason, or planning. Play over Peter's actions in your mind and see for yourself. Consider Jesus' response (when there is one) to these actions.

Let's take the trip to Gennesaret as an example. Jesus shows up in the middle of a storm on the water. Peter asks for proof that it is Him. That is about the most reasonable statement Peter might have made in the gospels in situations that are testing his faith. It is sensible to ask for proof. Nobody has walked on water before, right? Don't get me wrong, I think it is amazing that Peter even wanted to believe that it could be Jesus! Please don't take this like I'm putting Peter down in this moment. Jesus tells Peter to come to him on the water. This is where it gets ridiculous. Peter knows there is no way he can walk on that water unless it is Jesus. Let me say again, believing that statement is no small feat. Living that statement is even more elusive. Even so, Peter goes through with it. There is no guarantee that he will be all right other than the Word of Jesus. To the surprise of those in the boat, Peter starts walking on water. Now comes the storm. Immediately, Peter takes his eyes off of Jesus and starts to sink. Peter cries out, "Save me Lord!" Jesus does and says something about how little faith Peter had in that moment. Why did Peter doubt?

Peter taking his eyes off of Jesus and what follows is a great parallel for the heart of Jesus' instructions to his disciples. After rebuking Satan (toward Peter), Jesus turns to the disciples and says, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." Peter lost focus and sank. Peter lost focus because of his emotions and told Jesus that He wasn't going to die like He said. Peter lost focus multiple times during their relationship. His heart however, was bent on selling out to Jesus; to doing whatever it took to get and stay close to Him no matter what.

Peter answers rightly when Jesus asks the question, "Who do you say that I am?" Jesus calls Peter blessed, and says that His Father in Heaven taught Peter this truth. (Matthew 16:17)
The man that directly contradicted Jesus - blessed.
The man that lost focus again and again - blessed.
The man who denied that he knew Jesus again and again and again - BLESSED.

Finally, the relationship (on earth) between Jesus and Peter culminates in John 21, at the 3rd appearance of Jesus.

John 21:15-19
15When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?"
"Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my lambs."
16Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?"
He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep."
17 The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my sheep. 18 I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go." 19Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, "Follow me!"

It is glaringly obvious that Jesus, on purpose, asks Peter 3 times if he loves Him. Peter insists each time that he does. Peter even answers yes to whether he loves Jesus "more" than these (referencing the other disciples). "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you" is Peter's response. The 3 questions seem to each be uncovering a different layer of Peter's experience. I'm sure that the 3rd time Jesus asked him, rang familiar to Peter with regards to him denying Christ 3 times. Perhaps the 2nd time, Peter might have flinched wondering where Jesus was going with the line of questioning. I can only guess, as much as I have learned from Peter with the limited knowledge I have of Jesus. The point though for the scope of this content is that Jesus asks, and Peter answers YES all 3 times.

The 3rd time Jesus responds to the yes with a description of how Peter is going to die for Him. Then, Jesus says "Follow me!" I think that Peter, through all that he's been through with Jesus, has learned a great deal. Notice though, that even now Peter is still having trouble focusing on Jesus because he is still so concerned about what is going to happen to John. It is like being in the boat to Gennesaret again except this time the storm that is making him lose focus is internal, and not external. It might be envy, I cannot be sure. However it is certain that for a brief moment, Peter is more concerned with knowing what is going to happen with John than with following Jesus. That is the point.

Peter's passion is to be held up as an example. His heart was for Christ. His passion can only be rivaled by Paul's once that miraculous conversion takes place. Even still, that is good company to be keeping when it comes to passion. Recognize though that Peter's passion alone wasn't a complete package. He needs Christ, and is about to embark on one of the most important tasks of God's story - starting the church. Christ has no problem accepting, loving, and saving Peter full of unhinged passion alone; but what Christ was asking of Peter had as much to do with his focus as it did with his passion. Peter had to learn to focus and it wasn't easy for him to do it.

Part of your response to God in your life will have something to do with things that are not your gifts. It will probably be the most difficult process of your life. It might feel all wrong and make no sense whatsoever. Jesus asked Peter to follow him - to focus on him. That meant that Peter might have to fight back an emotional urge sometimes in order to keep moving rightly in the direction God was taking him. Did you get that? It's not a matter of going the right direction, God will take care of the direction of your life. It's a matter of acting rightly in the direction that is laid before you. (See Micah 6:8)

In order for Peter to act rightly, he had to begin living differently.
Seek the counsel of the Holy Spirit. Press into intimacy with a Lord who loves you more than you can imagine.
Live differently. Grace will be there...and will always be enough.