Divorcing God Daily

This post deals with the extremely delicate topic of divorce. To some I'm just a kid; so I don't pretend to have all the answers, or be right about everything. I have lived through my parent's divorce as a teenager, so I feel somewhat qualified to talk about it. I know what it did to me - what it still does to me. I know a little bit about who God is too.

If Christians are not brave enough to talk about it, we'll never get it right.

Last evening, as I was talking with my good friend, we hit the topic of divorce.

My parents are divorced, they separated when I was about 13, and divorced when I was about 17. For most of my younger childhood though, I grew up with both parents. It was when I started to define who I was going to be that I had more time on my own.

Let's move up to approximately 4 years ago. It was the day before my wedding. I felt an extremely deep sense of fear. I reluctantly, and in a very frustrated fashion, poured out my feelings about this fear to my wife-to-be late that night (the night before we were getting married).

Just for a moment, let's talk about the word covenant before I digress too much.

Near the beginning, at least in the bible, God made a covenant with Noah. (Genesis 6:18)

There was a covenant made with Abram (Genesis 15, Genesis 17)

Much later, God continues to communicate the same covenant through Moses to Israel when saving them and bringing them out of Egypt (Exodus 6, Exodus 19)

Covenant where Jesus is concerned?

Luke 22:20

"In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you."

2 Corinthians 3 (The glory of the new covenant)

Hebrews 7:18-25

"The former regulation is set aside because it was weak and useless 19(for the law made nothing perfect), and a better hope is introduced, by which we draw near to God.
20And it was not without an oath! Others became priests without any oath, 21but he became a priest with an oath when God said to him: "The Lord has sworn and will not change his mind: 'You are a priest forever.' " 22Because of this oath, Jesus has become the guarantee of a better covenant.
23Now there have been many of those priests, since death prevented them from continuing in office; 24but because Jesus lives forever, he has a permanent priesthood. 25Therefore he is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them."

The dictionary defines covenant as an agreement between 2 people that they will, or will not, do something. It also defines it as the bible does as an alternate definition, that it is God's agreement with people.

See, here's the thing, when you get married, you stand before the person you are marrying, and you stand before God. You stand before both and basically say, "No matter what happens, I'm going to stick with you until death." When you do this, you enter into a covenant that God is involved in. You stand before God whether you believe in him or not. If you didn't stand before God, you are not married. Marriage is a covenant relationship. It is a relationship that is between a husband, a wife, and God.

Pastor's or priests sometimes say, "by the power vested in me..."

Who do we think is doing the "vesting of power"? The only thing that can "vest true power in you" is God. God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. If you don't believe in God, take it as a lesson. If you do believe in God, take it as a reminder.

Matthew 5:31

""It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' 32But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery."

This is Jesus speaking. He makes a statement about what should be the past. There is a clear offense, and a clear exception in his statement. The offense of a husband that divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress. Not only that, but anyone who marries that divorced woman commits adultery." Which makes sense. Why does it make sense? Because of the covenant. Without the idea that marriage is a union between 3 entities (2 people, 1 God), you can argue this all you want and I can't refute it.

To everyone that believes in Christ, the Bible is your rulebook. You should not, although you have the choice, to divorce God from your daily stuff. If divorce is happening in your marriage (like paperwork and legally) - divorce from one another has already been going on for awhile. Not only divorce from each other, but also divorce from God. In the covenant...there were/are 3. You can't really divorce one without divorcing the other in your decision. I'm not saying God doesn't forgive you or go with you (as you already read) - but you divorced God from your decision. There is a separation, a compartmentalization that went on. You locked God out of your world, and made the decision on your own (like we do so often with so much sin).

Read it and follow it. Sometimes, we mess up, because we're human. If you made a decision to get divorced after you became a Christian (without adultery or death in the mix), you made a choice that doesn't reflect your faith. I know what you're thinking. What about abuse? My husband / wife hit me! He/She hit my kids! My life was in danger!

I don't understand it either. Neither did the disciples. What Jesus said to them was extremely hard to hear - but even harder to live.

Matthew 19:1-12

"1When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. 2Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
4"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' 5and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? 6So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
7"Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

That being said, God is good.

Here's what I mean by that.

Romans 8:10

"8But what does it say? "The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart," that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: 9That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved."

If you have divorced, and also believe in Jesus, God is with you. I know thus far, it sounds like I'm beating up on those of you who are divorced for any reason, and that is not the case. My point is not to "beat up" on anyone here. The truth is the truth, but it must be spoken in love. I needed to lay some groundwork above before writing what the deal is.

The deal is this, if you know Christ and are in, or ever encounter a situation of difficulty or challenge with your spouse...you need to seek Christ (together preferably) to provide power, guidance, reconciliation, joy, peace. God is love, and it is the only love that lasts forever. Without seeking Christ and letting your relationship be led by the Holy Spirit, be covered always in the grace of God, and full of forgiveness, a "Christian" marriage is doomed to fail. Period. The truth is that everything you need to succeed in a marriage "under God" comes from God. You cannot do it on your own, like so many other things that go on with the life of a Christian.

If you do not know Christ. It is better for you to know Christ. Without Christ in my life, I would not have a marriage. I would not have ever had the strength to stand there and promise to love someone until death. My parents couldn't do it, why should I even try? I was so scared, I was terrified of failing at it. I was sure I'd screw it up somehow (and I was right). My marriage is held together because of the power of God; plain and simple. I find stuff to love my wife with I never knew was available because God is gracious and lets me borrow some stuff He knows she will like. The same is true for my wife toward me. He is the center; He is the hope; He is the all in all. I'm getting better at it (at least I hope), but without His help I would have nothing to go on...nothing that worked anyway.

You may very well live this life in happiness, but without the knowledge of Christ you will not be saved from an eternity in hell, absent of the presence of God. I say this to you so that you might share in the joy and the peace and the everlasting life that is Christ Jesus for those who believe in Him. Jesus Christ died for your sins, he sacrificed himself as the Son of God to become payment for the sins of all people. All sins all people have committed have been paid for. This is not a permission slip to continue sinning (which Paul says in the New Testament) but it is a special gift of God that we may receive his rich mercy and infinite supply of grace through Christ Jesus and be ushered with him into the presence of God covered by His blood that is without sin. I have no right to stand before God of my own accord. I should be in hell, just like all people except for Jesus Christ. But that was not the plan. God had a plan for redemption, for reconciliation to himself; and that is only Jesus Christ.

Romans 8:1-4

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. 3For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, 4in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit. "

These verses are supposed to change how we live - - they are designed so that we remember who we are in Christ toward right action. Live according to the Spirit, and not according to the flesh alone, the mind alone, or the emotions alone. The Spirit was designed to trump all of these things, not be picked up and set down like a toy that serves us whenever we want. We are in service to One who is infinitely greater, and full of love. Doesn't One like that deserve your obedience?

Seeking Breakthrough

Matthew 17:14-18 (NKJV)
And when they had come to the multitude, a man came to Him, kneeling down to Him and saying, 15 “Lord, have mercy on my son, for he is an epileptic and suffers severely; for he often falls into the fire and often into the water. 16 So I brought him to Your disciples, but they could not cure him.” 17 Then Jesus answered and said, “O faithless and perverse generation, how long shall I be with you? How long shall I bear with you? Bring him here to Me.” 18 And Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of him; and the child was cured from that very hour.

The thought behind this verse in Matthew has always intrigued me. The story of a man who takes his son to the disciples fully expecting them to heal his son. Or should I say, fully expecting God to heal his son through them. Yet, that doesn't happen. For some reason, even after Jesus has "sent" his disciples to perform miracles, and they have performed miracles before this...they cannot do it.
I'd like to hit pause on the story here, and think about what that means for us...today. Today, there is no "person" of Jesus sitting around, waiting for the time when someone fails to perform a miracle. Thinking about it like this, there is a danger in us being somehow unequipped as the disciples were in this situation.

Let's look at this for just a moment. The deal is that this boy has a "demon" according to the bible. Some translations say "epileptic," yet the root cause is understood to be a demon, something evil and from Satan to plague humans. The disciples try to cast it out, but the boy's state is unchanged. The boy is not healed. When Jesus hears that the disciples could not take care of this, there is a statement he makes about the "faithless and perverse" generation. I can almost hear the tone, like an exhausted tone. Jesus calls for the boy to be brought to him. The boy is healed.

So we have the disciples, who on some level are "faithless and perverse" where Jesus wasn't.
Now it is the same power healing the boy through the disciples, and through Jesus. So that means there is something about Jesus that was different than the disciples.

Matthew 17:19-21
"19 Then the disciples came to Jesus privately and said, “Why could we not cast it out?” 20 So Jesus said to them, “Because of your unbelief; for assuredly, I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you. 21 However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting.”

Jesus points to the "unbelief" of the disciples as a reason they could not cast out the demon. Yet after describing that, there is more. In vs. 21 Jesus says, "However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting."

OK, I've gone long enough without just saying it.
I believe that we (as believers in Christ) hold the keys to unlock the power of God in our lives. Specifically, the decision we make to pray and the decision we make to fast for spiritual breakthrough. I firmly believe that there are things that God wants to do in people's lives on this earth that aren't done because we don't prepare ourselves to usher them into being.

Romans 12:1-2
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Now I'm not saying to stop eating today, because that is not biblical.
Fasting is refraining from "something" (most often food) for a spiritual purpose. I would bet that one of many spiritual purposes that Jesus had fasted / prayed for was to cast out the demon in that boy. That obedience unlocked the power that was needed. See, Jesus was God in the flesh. He had the foreknowledge to know what was coming his way. There was times spent with the Father in secret where I think this foreknowledge was extended and made clear so that Jesus would know what action he needed to take to be obedient to the will of the Father. Jesus at this point knew that it was God's design to heal this boy, so he could make statements about what was preventing it from happening separate from the will of God.

There are many other examples of fasting breakthrough throughout the bible. Moses, David, Elijah, and Daniel to name a few; not to mention Peter (was fasting when he saw a vision to go to the Gentiles), and on many occasions Paul.

I find myself in a spot in life where I "need" breakthrough spiritually. There are health issues with my family that I'd like to see taken care of. Doctors can't find a true cause. That's the great thing, for those of us who believe in Christ, we will always have a doctor who is capable of healing. What if your healing lies behind a fast? What if it lies behind 40 days of fasting?

I have fasted before. A few 3 day things and 1 time a 14 day fast drinking just water. While I'm thinking of it, don't fast without drinking water. Water is a faster's best friend. Drink water, and plenty of it. When you fast, give up something that matters to God. Food normally matters to all of us, especially certain types of food. Only try longer fasts after you have tried shorter ones, and only try complete fasts (no food or water) after doing a few longer fasts so you are familiar with the territory. There is faith about true fasting, and there is focus on God. If you have any questions or doubts, consult a medical doctor as you fast. They should tell you that it has true medicinal benefits and can help keep your body healthy. I say that understanding that all of our bodies are different, which is why you should talk to a doctor that is familiar with you and can guide you the first few times.

Even though I have fasted before, I don't personally know the extent of blessing found behind fasting. Don't get me wrong, I have experienced blessing behind a fast, I just hear many people talk about blessings and how God "opens the floodgates" when people fast. Like fasting is a key to unlocking deeper relationship with God and unleashing the power of the Holy Spirit. I want that in my relationship with God. I "hunger" for deeper relationship with Him that is meaninful, practical, and can show people that He is the only God that is to receive glory, worship, honor and praise. Remember, no food is not enough. Have purpose.

I think it is time for me to find out "how deep the rabbit hole goes."
Chances are it is infinite, because God is infinite.

I am reading a book right now by Jentezen Franklin called "fasting."
I recommend it for anyone thinking about this topic. I am finding it greatly helpful and encouraging.

A Call to True Christian Community

I heard a good sermon today. It impacted me to the point where I feel compelled to write about it more and more. Then I remembered, "I have a blog...and I haven't written in it in a month! Perfect!"

John 13:34,35 - "I give you a new commandment, that you love one another just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
A majority of the things I will be talking about find their foundation in this verse. Some things mentioned are borrowed from the pastor I heard them from.

To start things off from there, I'd like to note that perfect love casts out all fear. This is an interesting statement when you take the time to think about how we treat one another relationally, when it comes to the body of Christ. To qualify this statement, John 13:34,35 should be applied when it comes to community within the body of Christ. That means that if you are (or claim to be) a Christian, Jesus is talking to you. If you do not believe in Christ, you are not held to this standard of living at the present time. For Christians, the bible is the rulebook; and we are not exempt from commands therein. This is just one of those commands.

Perfect love casts out all fear. I dare say that I see much fear in the way Christians relate to one another these days. I think individually we fear many different things and therefore we treat relationships as if they were eggs. We hold them in our hands with care and great trembling. I agree with the care part. This verse says that we must do more than care for one another...we must "love" one another.

"I (Jesus) give you a new commandment..."
A command. Seems very straightforward. Let's move on.

"...that you love one another just as I have loved you, you also should love one another."
This begs the question, "How did Jesus love?" He is referencing the way he loved his own disciples as the way they should love each other. Jesus is all in all, so I'm thinking the same thing that you are, "Yeah right! Jesus, that is crazy! I can't love other people like you love me!" I'm thinking that Jesus knows you can't do this on your own; while that is the case the command remains the same.
So how did Jesus love his disciples? He taught them, washed their feet, encouraged them, challenged them, rebuked and corrected them, hoped in them, put His trust in them, send them out on His behalf, spent time with them, forgave them, extended grace to them, and probably many other things I am forgetting.

The disciples were all unique people, just like us. Put in today's language, some were probably more patient than others, while still others may have used more common sense than the rest. As people, we like to love from where we are, and from how we want to be loved. So, if I want you to treat me in a forgiving manner, I will forgive you offenses against me...because I would be a hypocrite otherwise right? This view of Christian relationship; the view that keeps the peace at the expense of reflecting the great love of Christ is a terrible folly of today.

Just today, I had to contact a friend of mine. Now, this friend unknowingly had made a comment that hurt me. It was just a joke, and I knew in my heart that there was no offense to it. But the comment kept bothering me. Isn't that really stupid? I knew better in my head. This is a guy that I know wouldn't speak something like he said to hurt me and with whom I've been in relationship for awhile. Once I finally got to the bottom of the issue I realized that what was bothering me was that he hesitated to "let me in on the joke that was really about me." I could care less that he was joking about me in good fun, but he hesitated when I turned and said, "What was that?" because I honestly didn't hear him the first time. I thought to myself, "Why did he hesitate? Does he think I should somehow be approaching this situation differently or was it just a joke?"
I knew it was probably nothing, but at this point I was not yet excused biblically. I felt hurt. I knew who made the statement that hurt me. It is my responsibility to take that to him because by not telling him, I'm not only prolonging my own hurt and making it worse...but I'm depriving him of the knowledge that what he said could have really hurt me. See, with that knowledge he can be a better friend, a better brother in Christ, a better encourager, a better piece of iron. Without coming forward, I was robbing him of that. Not to mention I would be robbing myself of a full friendship in Christ...which is what this is all about.

On the other side of things, we should all be encouraged by this to challenge one another. To correct with love like that of Christ! It is important to remember that while you are called to do this, you are not called to do it alone (like with so many things). Jesus Christ has given you a helper in His Holy Spirit. We are equipped by the Holy Spirit to correct one another. By that same Holy Spirit we should be equipped to receive correction from one another. These 2 things need to be there in order to grow in Christ and in love for His body. Not to mention how critical it is to allow the Holy Spirit to be facilitating discernment in all these things. This brings us to the final statement of the verse.

"By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, that you have love for one another."
Folks, if you are going to compromise with any part of your Christian faith, let it not be with this part. I would recommend not compromising with any part of your faith, but because we are people and always growing we won't ever have achieved "perfection" while on this earth. Other people will know Christ because of how Christians treat each other. Wow. Suddenly, I am greatly saddened. Today, it is becoming more and more difficult to treat one another with respect, honesty, dignity, integrity, and most of all...without unjustified fear, anger, or indifferent emotions.

To every Christian out there who doesn't think they have work left to do, you are wrong. If you somehow believe that all other purpose has left you...love your friends as Christ loved His disciples. If your friends are not with you anymore, cry out to God for a community that you can love like He loved His disciples and go looking for it. Present a holy example for being in what we refer to as "Christian community." Be men and women of integrity, and uprightness of heart. It is this kind of faithfulness to the "smaller" things that will be credited to you as righteousness. Truly love one another. Don't accept anything less than a biblical relationship. There should be peace in relationship; but not at the expense of conviction, of correction, of encouragement, or of action for Christ. All are important, and only working together do these things put on display the love of Christ for all to see. "A light that shines in the darkness..."

Seek First the Kingdom

On May 31st, Mr. Chambers' devotional includes an entry entitled Put God First. Because this entry seems very fitting for me to "re-start" my blogging with...here goes.

The Holy Spirit has proved to me, yet again, that He can sift through as much junk as I can pile on top of my heart to get in the way of God's plan or design for my life. Said another way, I cannot make enough mistakes, keep enough idols, be stressed out enough, or have taken 1 too many steps away from God for Him through His Spirit to come through and say, "You're not seeking me." Said in a way that is straight from the Bible, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither present or future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - From Romans 8:38,39

Now, that being said; it doesn't mean that when He comes and says "You're not seeking me" that seeking will be easy to do so. It does not mean that it will make any worldly sense to do so. However, if you have chosen to believe in Jesus Christ and have a great amount of proverbial "junk" piled on your heart, you will know in your heart and in your mind 2 things. You will begin to understand that you are not seeking Him, which may come to a surprise for you (as it did me). Second, you realize that change is necessary; change that gets you into position to seek Him first at all costs. Until I was able to separate myself from my "daily life" for a few days (I was on vacation at the time), and reflect on what is really going on in your heart...you think you are serving God and seeking Him first. In my case, which is all I can speak to, Satan was definitely tricking me into believing that in spite of how stressed out I was, and how negatively my attitude was impacting my environment that I was doing what God wanted me to do.

Sound familiar? It's the same story as in Genesis, when the serpent (Satan) tricked Eve into eating fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. It's the same trick, just different person, different time, and different circumstances. Same Satan, same God, same results. For many years, this was the case, and Satan had me tricked into believe that I was living for God; led by the Holy Spirit. Oh don't get me wrong, the Holy Spirit was working through me. There were times when I would say things to my friends, or in church groups that was wisdom or understanding I know I did not come to on my own. See, when Satan gets involved, he doesn't need to shut you down completely, he just needs to veer you off or distract you from what God is doing in your life. It's about what God wants YOU to do. You can (and often times will) be very busy with seemingly "good things" when Satan has you right where he wants you. Much discernment is needed in these times in life.

My apologies, I've digressed. Back to the title of the post, which is "Seek First the Kingdom."
Matthew 6:33: "But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Hmmm...all these things. What are all these things? Well, in the paragraph before this verse, we're told. They are to not worry about the following: your life, what you will eat or drink, about your body, what you will wear, about adding a single hour to your span of life. So, if you seek God's Kingdom first, all these things will be given to you as well. Let me say again, that there is a major amount of discernment to be happening in this process. I don't recommend resigning your job just because you think that you are not seeking God. You can definitely just re-focus your priorities and get back on track with God. That is if you know what God is asking of you, and the something God is asking of you is in line with whatever you find yourself currently involved in.

Prayer and reading God's word is important here. If you are not spending time with the Lord, chances are that you will not know what He is asking of you. The Holy Spirit speaks to you about your life and truth that is God's word as it is relevant to your life if you have chosen to believe in Jesus Christ and been baptized in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. If you know what God is asking of you, then you just have to do whatever it takes to get to where doing that is a priority in your life. Make God priority 1. Make His Kingdom come first, and the stuff that you need will be provided for you by a living God, who is alive in us through the Holy Spirit because of the great sacrifice of God's son, Jesus Christ.

The problem comes when you are working only for the things that God promises anyway if you seek His kingdom first. It is like you are just skipping over God. I know this is a challenge, and I'm challenging many people's theology here. It is good, and sometimes God, to work for those things. Again discernment is needed. Are you receiving the things in your life (what you will eat, drink, wear, etc) because you having the $$$ to go out and get those things for yourself and your family; OR are you receiving the things in your life from God, because you are seeking his Kingdom first.

I'm going to end this here, because I am already walking a "thin line" so to speak. God can be in your life, working. At the same time, Satan can be in your life, working. God is bigger than Satan, but people are warned in the Bible that they should not serve 2 masters. That's the thing isn't it? It is possible for you and me to be serving 2 masters at the same time in different (or even the same) parts of our lives. This is the danger. There is a difference between simply having a sinful nature and screwing up...asking God for forgiveness, and unknowingly serving 2 masters if you have made a decision for Christ. Making a decision for Jesus Christ means that you have decided to have only 1 master. I encourage you to look deep into your life and where provision is coming from. Are you providing for yourself separate from the will of God for your life; or is your provision coming from Him because you have decided to put His kingdom first? Only you and God, through the Holy Spirit can make that call, and take action if it is necessary.